Past me

I discovered a bunch of poems I wrote in 2014. One pointless, one heartfelt, and two written purely to see if I could. Enjoy 😉

Would you rather?

I’d rather be early and then have to wait
Than leave on time and still be late.
I’d pay a high price for a job well done
Before I’d opt for a cheap but shoddy one.
I don’t mind helping if the cause is good
But I won’t do it for you if I think you should.
I’d rather stay silent even though I’m right
Than force my position and start a fight.
I’d trade a hundred strangers for one true friend.
You’ll never see me break but I damn well bend.
I’d rather have consent that rule by fear
I only ever shout what you need to hear.
I’ll always choose comfort over made-up beauty
I don’t need to be some fake hot cutey. 😉
I’d rather read a book than watch TV
And I don’t think adaptations are as good as they could be.
I don’t feel the need to always be a bitch
But if you’re too damn perky it’ll make me twitch.
I don’t mind chocolate and I really love cheese
But whatever you do, no tomatoes please! (yuck)
I’d rather be invisible and that’s a fact
So when someone truly ‘sees’ me I don’t know how to act.
I’d rather keep my heart safe behind a wall
Than risk the hurt of another fall.


Watching José

He has nothing
Only a Tesco carrier bag
And shoes that fall apart.
So we gave him a name,
Like a pet
Or the girl with orange hair,
now dubbed Tango.
He shuffles through the day
Hand in his pocket in place of a belt.
I eat a wagon wheel
He searches for scraps in the carpark bins.
I tried to feed him once.
Shoebox full of food on a wall at midnight.
Think the bin men took it.
He washes his hands for almost an hour on cold days
In the public toilets.
Sometimes more than once.
He scares me.
If I try to help,
Will he want more than I have to give?
When did my soul become so poor?


If Lord of the Rings was a Disney Musical

Do you wanna go to Mordor
Might see some elves along the way
We’ll get a pony you can name him bill
We’ll find some orcs to kill
But then we’ll run away.
We’ll find some good companions,
And I’ll almost die
But hey Sam it might be fuuuuuuuun.
Do you wanna go to Mordor?
It doesn’t have to be to Mordor :shrug:
– Go away Frodo
Ok byyyeeeeeeeeeee.


If LOTR was a Disney Musical, Pt.2

Flames glow bright on the mountain tonight
Not a nazgul to be seen
Volcano of isolation
Sam and Frodo, what a team.
But don’t look now ’cause Gollum’s sneaking up behind
Gonna fight them both for his precious Ring.

Don’t let him win,
Don’t let him free
Be the Hobbits you always have to be
Be brave and strong
Don’t get this wrong
But now he’s goooooooone.

Let him go, let him go
Can’t follow him any more
Let him go, let him go
Burn the ring and win the war
I don’t care that he got away

Let the freak race on
Gollum never bothered me anyway.

It’s funny how two hobbits gave everyone the slip
Got through all of Mordor, past Sauron (what a drip)

They beat the orcs and shelob too
Got past the sentries and snuck through
No-one could stop them until now
Here’s how

Here he goes, here he goes
He’s sneaking back yet again
Here he goes, Here he goes
No Gollum’s not your friend.

Back again, to get in the way.
Let the freak sneak on

(Frodo puts the ring on)
My power flurries through the air to Sauron’s eye
He’s really pissed now all his Nazgul spread their wings and fly
And Gollum’s back and he’s still fighting like a brat
He bit your finger off, but now he’s falling back.

Let him go, let him go
Can’t hold him without your finger
Let him go, let him go
He was always such a whinger

Here you stand, bleeding on the floor.

Let the freak fall on.
Gollum never bothered me anyway.

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